Wanna know why?
I'm starting to get one of two feelings. Either having a one-year-old can be a royal pain. Or I'm not a very good mom. Either way, AV is having major trouble being satisfied or appeased by anything I do. There are only a very few things I can do right, right now. They are these:
1. Make bubbles in a bucket.
2. Feed her Jello.
And that's about it. If I stop making bubbles or choose to try to feed her something nutritious, there is a long, long, long time of crying, moaning, screaming, laying down, running around. And it's quite possible that the crying, etc isn't just AV.
There have to be more things that please her. There HAVE to be. Bubbles and Tina (aka Gelatina en espanol) That's it??? Those two things are what lead me to believe that maybe I'm just not that great of a mom. How is it possible that I can keep 50 5th graders at least somewhat entertained for 6 hours, but I cannot entertain my own child?
Are there parenting books that I should be reading? Are there foods that are magical? Should I just let her play with the stupid bucket and one inch of water and a few squirts of soap and a couple clothes pegs all the livelong day even if it's raining out?
Now, about rain. I've talked about before, but seriously. Rain has made me cry more than weather ever should. My mom gets here tomorrow and we're planning a weekend out and about which means that the clothes needed to be washed today. But since the Clothesline Snafu of 2011, I can only do one load a day. Well, today, I pressed my luck. I tempted fate and Mother Nature. And I lost. Well, AV's clothes lost. Now, the Lord only knows when those clothes will get dry. It's quite possible that they will hang on that broken clothesline until we're back on Monday, and then they'll get washed again. Lame.
Speaking of lame. Mexico City's car circulation laws. Now, those are lame. If you know me, you know that I am a friend of the environment. I recycle even though it means driving my recycling across town. I don't feel goofy taking my bags to the grocery store. I don't mind showering quickly to save water. Whatev, you get the picture. We want to go into the city tomorrow because Ramon has to go for work anyway, and then head to the airport to get my mom. This will save us time, money, energy, and be a fun way to spend the day. But, I can't drive my car in Mexico City until 11 am and Ramon has to be where he needs to be by 10. What this means for the Alvarez Familia is this. Ramon has to get up super early, take a taxi across town, take a bus to Mexico City, take another taxi to where he needs to be, Ana and I have to drive to the bus station later, take the bus to the airport, Ramon has to take another taxi to the airport to meet us and then Ramon, my mom, AV and I will have to buy tickets and ride the bus back to Puebla, then drive home. Not only will our environmental impact be much greater, the financial impact will go from around 40 bucks total to over 100.
Today has made me want to scream quite a few times. I may, just may, have not been the most patient, loving mother to my little AV. I may, just may, have found myself sitting on the kitchen floor crying. And, btw, complaining is so obnoxious that I really don't even want to press publish on this post.
Sorry, better luck tomorrow. Silver lining? My mom will be here tomorrow. Yes, yes she will.