Thursday, July 28, 2011

One of Those Days.

Today has been one of those Mexico days. Or maybe one of those Mom of a one-year-old days. Or maybe a combination of the two.

Wanna know why?

I'm starting to get one of two feelings. Either having a one-year-old can be a royal pain. Or I'm not a very good mom. Either way, AV is having major trouble being satisfied or appeased by anything I do. There are only a very few things I can do right, right now. They are these:

1. Make bubbles in a bucket.
2. Feed her Jello.

And that's about it. If I stop making bubbles or choose to try to feed her something nutritious, there is a long, long, long time of crying, moaning, screaming, laying down, running around. And it's quite possible that the crying, etc isn't just AV.

There have to be more things that please her. There HAVE to be. Bubbles and Tina (aka Gelatina en espanol) That's it??? Those two things are what lead me to believe that maybe I'm just not that great of a mom. How is it possible that I can keep 50 5th graders at least somewhat entertained for 6 hours, but I cannot entertain my own child?

Are there parenting books that I should be reading? Are there foods that are magical? Should I just let her play with the stupid bucket and one inch of water and a few squirts of soap and a couple clothes pegs all the livelong day even if it's raining out?

Now, about rain. I've talked about before, but seriously. Rain has made me cry more than weather ever should. My mom gets here tomorrow and we're planning a weekend out and about which means that the clothes needed to be washed today. But since the Clothesline Snafu of 2011, I can only do one load a day. Well, today, I pressed my luck. I tempted fate and Mother Nature. And I lost. Well, AV's clothes lost. Now, the Lord only knows when those clothes will get dry. It's quite possible that they will hang on that broken clothesline until we're back on Monday, and then they'll get washed again. Lame.

Speaking of lame. Mexico City's car circulation laws. Now, those are lame. If you know me, you know that I am a friend of the environment. I recycle even though it means driving my recycling across town. I don't feel goofy taking my bags to the grocery store. I don't mind showering quickly to save water. Whatev, you get the picture. We want to go into the city tomorrow because Ramon has to go for work anyway, and then head to the airport to get my mom. This will save us time, money, energy, and be a fun way to spend the day. But, I can't drive my car in Mexico City until 11 am and Ramon has to be where he needs to be by 10. What this means for the Alvarez Familia is this. Ramon has to get up super early, take a taxi across town, take a bus to Mexico City, take another taxi to where he needs to be, Ana and I have to drive to the bus station later, take the bus to the airport, Ramon has to take another taxi to the airport to meet us and then Ramon, my mom, AV and I will have to buy tickets and ride the bus back to Puebla, then drive home. Not only will our environmental impact be much greater, the financial impact will go from around 40 bucks total to over 100.

Today has made me want to scream quite a few times. I may, just may, have not been the most patient, loving mother to my little AV. I may, just may, have found myself sitting on the kitchen floor crying. And, btw, complaining is so obnoxious that I really don't even want to press publish on this post.

Sorry, better luck tomorrow. Silver lining? My mom will be here tomorrow. Yes, yes she will.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Extreme Laundry

Usually my extreme laundry posts are about how I turn my living room, dining room, any other room possible into a makeshift clothes rack because the once sun shiny day has morphed into the thunderstorm from hell.

Not this time. Nope. Today my extreme laundry takes the form of whiny baby, meets almost entirely hung up load of laundry meets clothes line breaks.

It was not my finest hour.

You see, patience and I are not known to be on the friendliest of terms. Frustration and me, on the other hand, best buds. Throw in a baby on her last leg before a much needed nap, and you've got yourself the makings of a disaster.

I had the entire load hung. I was just missing the socks. When Pop. Everything is now in the grass. Baby starts screaming. I just about flip my lid. We all fall apart.

Step 1. Put baby to bed. Eliminating one frustration factor will make second frustration factor slightly less obnoxious.

Step 2. Decide that when there is enough money in savings, it will be withdrawn and invested in a dryer thus, eliminating frustration factor.

Step 3. Take picture with fancy dancy new BlackBerry and send to husband with the caption, "The clothesline just broke." Not as though he can do anything about it from his office, but just to prepare him for what's to come this evening.

Step 4. Decide I will fix it myself, darnit. Planning conversation with husband when he inevitably asks what I did to break it. I'm the queen of one-sided conversations, in fact I have one going right now with the phone company, too.

Step 5. Eat my own thoughts and feel terrible when husband's response is, "Hmm, I must not have put it in right. I'll check it tonight." Feel like an idiot for starting imaginary fight, focus energy on phone company convo.

Step 6. Eat 2 chocolates to alter mood and access problem-solving capabilities.

Step 7. Utilize still functioning part of the clothes line and successfully hang up load of laundry.

Step 8. Blog about my own ridiculous self.

Step 9. Try not to scream as I see clouds heading our direction...

Tuesday, July 12, 2011


I'm from Washington. I know rain. I get rain. Rain and I are like bff.

I feel this way about Washington rain. Puebla rain, on the other hand, can shove it. Maybe those are strong words, but I'm a strong girl.

So, let me tell you about my day. The day greeted us with bright sun, birds chirping, and all the hopes in the world for a gorgeous July day. When, I ask, when will I learn that sun in the morning means nothing? Very slow learning curve on this one.

AV and I played with the umbrella outside in the sun, because AV doesn't do toys. She plays with limes and spoons and umbrellas, apparently.

After some morning fun in the sun, she took a nice nap and after lunch I decided it would be a grand idea to go to the park and to Costco. So, across town we went. The moment we got out of the car there was a giant, black, ominous cloud heading our way. I should have just put her back in and gone home there and then, but, I tell you, I'm really slow on this learning curve thing. So, we took one swing and about 3 slides, looked at some peacocks and called it good. We rushed over to Costco got our things, and a hotdog, so maybe not SO rushed, but whatev. And, then we buckled in for the ride home.

Driving straight into the eye of the storm. I kid you not. Sprinkles, showers, rain, pelting rain, can't see anything rain. All in a matter of a mile.

At this point, I'm chatting AV up, "Wow. This is quite a storm, bug. Wow. That's a lot of rain. Wooo."

As I take the left turn at the end of one road onto another, we pull out into, not a street, but a river. No, actually, I'll call it a creek since, what was in store was a river. We continue through the rapidly rising creek also known as Blvd Forjadores, and turn right onto the street that takes us home. Great, I'm thinking, it's totally clear. Right? Wrong.

There should have been a sign that said "Cross the railroad tracks and die." I did cross them. And I stopped. Stared. Disbelief. Honest to goodness, I am not lying when I tell you there were honest to goodness, white water rapids heading our direction. The busses' wheels were covered. It was up and over the sidewalks. The waves were rocking the car. I'm not exaggerating. Really, I promise, I'm not.

I checked on AV. Zonked out. Great, now I'm alone with my terror. Should I wait? Should I turn around? Should I drive through? Should we get out and swim?

Now, I find rain in Puebla terrifyingly hysterical. Terrifying, because, I don't want to be stuck in a river with a CRV and a one-year old. Hysterical because I think, Lord Almighty, where did you get all of this water in just one hour? How is that possible?

I made the executive decision as captain of the CRV to turn around and park the car. Good idea, I collected myself and made a plan. I would not be driving through the white water rapids otherwise known as Avenida Mexico-Puebla. I decided I would turn around and go the creek road to the freeway and come in the other side. Good plan.

Now, I made that happen with little to no hyperventilation. Until I got on the freeway. Why do semis show up when you're already on the brink of heart attack? Now, I'm driving behind a semi through enormous lakes, hydroplaning through patches here and there.

Safely exit, look up into the heavens and what to my wondering eyes should appear? Blue sky.

How does that happen????

PS. We made it home safely.

Saturday, July 9, 2011


Miss AV is talking up a storm. I have no other reference point to prove that her talking can be defined as a storm, but it's a lot more than I was expecting for her age. And, she's my kid and everything she does is amazing.

I feel like she's extra amazing since she's learning two languages and seems to be doing it quickly and effortlessly.

Here's what she says.

Agua. Agua for juice, agua for water, agua for rain, agua for the shower. If it's liquid, it's agua.

Ah ya. She copies Abuela whose phrase of choice is 'Ah, ya.' Like ah, ok. or something of the sort.

Apple. She loves them.

Baby and Bebe. She likes babies, as long as they are not near or being touched by me. Jealous, much?

Bio Bio. Birdie. The sound and the name. Birds are cool in her book.

Buh bye. When the shower gets turned off, she says Byebye Agua. Spanglish from the beginning. Me gusta.

Buggy. She knows what a fly is and is fascinated by them. She also knows her nickname.

Daddy. Make him swoon? Yes, she does.

Ellie. The elephant on Pocoyo and the elephant on the mirror in the car.

Fuchi. It means gross and she says it, makes faces and waves her hand while getting her diaper changed. Fuchi caca. Nice, AV.

Gigi. My mom's grandma name. She knows Gigi is in the phone, in the computer and in pictures. apparently Gigi is also Pops because a man with a goatee and a bald head came on tv and she pointed and said, "Gigi."

Hi. Just like me, same tone, same inflection. Nice.

Iago. There's a boy in the neighborhood named Santiago. She is in love. Santiago was holding her hand when she took a face plant into the concrete. Now she says, Iago, owee.

Juice. When she wants to, not always. Sometimes she'll even go so far as to say Apple juice. But, why go through all the effort when she gets what she needs by saying Agua.

Mama. Mommy. She can say that as much as her little heart desires in my book.

Melon. Fruit. If it's not an apple or a papaya, it's got to be a melon.

Limones. Mones are any fruit that is green. Green apples, kiwis, plums, which aren't green but they're small and round so that'll do, oh yeah, and limes. They are mones and love to be held, carried and hid in places.

Moño. Which is the bow in her hair or the bow on her shoes or the bow on her shirt or pants or wherever. My girl is a girlie-girl. Yes, she is.

Oh, No. When she knows she shouldn't do something. Or when she's being a pill. I think I will start hearing this more and more over the next few months and years.

Papaya. If it's orange or a fruit and not an apple or a mone, it's a papaya.

Please. Also a word of choice, which is great except for when it's screamed at me and followed by tears because even though she asked nicely, the answer is still no. Sorry, Ana. Even if you do say
Beeee, you cannot play with knives. Nice try, though.

Thank you. Not used quite as much as I'd like, but we'll get there.

Tia. Ramon's sister is on her list of favorite people. So much so, that Abuelo is now tia, too.

Ven. Come here.

Voy. I'm going.

Zoom. Helicopters go zoom. I don't blame her for choosing zoom instead of helicopter.

I know I'll press post and think of a bunch of other words she says, but, I think you and I are both done with my parent bragging for the day...

Friday, July 1, 2011

Baby #2

Bet I really piqued your interest with that title, huh?

This post is NOT about how I am pregnant with baby #2, but it's more about how I am nowhere near even the remote side of interested in growing my family.

It seems so strange to me. When I got married I wanted to have 4 kids. Now, just barely two years into it, I can honestly tell you that if I didn't have another baby, I wouldn't be upset about that. Which makes me wonder, is there something wrong with me?

My good friend whose baby is 5 minutes younger than AV is expecting. A coworker with an 18 month old is 4 months pregnant. I know all sorts of people who are on for baby #2 or 3 or more and are like gung-ho (is that how you spell that?) about babies.

To which I think,
1. Like, it seems like we just started sleeping all night again. Except for the part that we now have stairs in our house and I wake up like 4 times a night thinking that AV has Houdini-ly escaped from her crib, opened her door and fallen down said stairs.
2. Buying and changing two different sizes of diapers? No thanks.
3. What do you do with the sleeping situation? Two cribs? Put them together in one? Seriously, baby #1 is like real small for a big person bed. Where do you put the next one?
4. Two high chairs? Where are you going to put them to eat?

I know that I do want AV to have a brother or a sister. Though, I would really love it to be a sister since putting a boy in pink dresses and hair bows wouldn't really fly. I just think that it might be a realllllllllll long time before that happens.

Maybe it's because I thought that I would be like magically wealthy and be at home and have all of my needs and wants met by some money/time fairy. Or maybe I just assumed I would be better at balancing life with a job, a family and a washing machine but no dryer. I don't know.

But for now, if you're looking for baby news, click on someone else's blog. Sorry.