Gone, but not forgotten

Have you missed me?

So much has happened in the last month, good and bad. I'll try to do a quick summary for you.

1. Went back to work. The first day of school is always amazing. There so much wondering going on, just what oh what, incredible, invaluable, can't believe I lived so long without knowing this, information will they present to us?? Last year it was a mathematician who talked for, no joke, two full hours about doctorate level math problems with the sole purpose of showing us that with all that math that only about .2% of the population understands, you can, in fact, make a graph that is a pretty little flower. So, you can only imagine the level of excitement I had anticipating the first day. I was pleasantly surprised to have a visit from Apple, Latin America who told us all about the amazing things you can do with Apple products. Do you think I can do that with my Apple 2E (just kidding, I have a little fancier technology, a little)? Nope. But the second speaker blew me away. Did you know that you can get old without aging? I didn't. I still don't get it. I'm also still trying to figure out what that has to do with elementary school...

2. Computer stopped working. It turns on, and by on I mean the little blue lights on the top turn on. The screen? Not so much. That's fun. It will be around 200 bucks to get it fixed, which I have to do because my entire Master's degree and all of my pictures are saved on it and I'm not quite willing to live without those.

3. AV started eating food. She loves pears. She makes faces at the first bite of apples. She is an eating monster. She can roll over front to back and back to front. She laughs. She sleeps 11 hours. I love her. She's amazing.

4. Crashed Ramon's car. Insert your favorite expletive here and you might come close to the colorful language implemented by me last Thursday morning. Ramon's hierarchy? Ana, Car, Me. I think I might have dropped a few spots now, too. The good news? He's now speaking to me again. The bad news? I crashed his car. The good news? The baby wasn't with me and nobody was hurt. The bad news? I crashed his car. The good news? I learned how to call the insurance company and deal with transit police. The bad news? I crashed Ramon's car, had to deal with slimy corrupt policeman who took my money and then hit on me. Aaah, the joys of life.

So, that's me. Once I get the computer up and running again, I promise to make my absence up to you all. Please, don't go jumping off any cliffs. I still love you. I still think of you often. We will be together again.

4 months, what?

My baby girl is a world-traveling, laughing, rolling, sleeping through the night (almost), machine.

I love her with everything that I am. Even when she's being a turd.

Here she is all dolled up in a dress that was hand-made for her by one of Ramon's family members in Veracruz. So sweet!

Traveling with AV

Getting on an airplane with a baby is a serious walk of shame.

I see your scornful looks. I hear your silent prayer, "Please, for the love of all that is holy, do NOT let that baby be sitting by me." I feel your dread. Your attempts to hide are feeble. Don't fake smile at my baby, she sees right through you.

I laugh now, ha ha ha, because you are kicking yourself and feeling guilty for underestimating the amazing, super-hero-esque, lovable little girl that I call my child.

Ana Victoria was a FABULOUS little traveler. Scream it from the hilltops. AV has redeemed the name of traveling babies for once and for all. (We will accept your congratulations and thank you's through monetary donations...no limit)

This little one loves adventure, I guess.

In 18 days we did all of the following plus some. We rode the bus to Mexico City, flew to Houston, stood in line with 20 other flight's worth of passengers, missed our connection, ate a ridiculously overpriced salad, flew to Seattle, visited, shopped, played, swam, met people, hung out with cousins, went to church, ate too many Cheez-its, flew to San Francisco, drove to San Jose, met great-grandparents, picked oranges, drove to San Luis Obispo, partied with the Hickey's, got up at 5 am, drove back to San Fran, spent 15 bucks on a bagel and fruit, flew to Mexico City, waited for a stroller that never arrived, reunited with Ramon, rode the bus back to Puebla, stopped for tacos and went home!

I guess that just means we'll have to travel more. I'll make that sacrifice for you, AV. Who loves ya?

Mexico Q & A

I live in Mexico. Surprisingly, this brings on lots more questions then, say, living in Bellevue does. They are all, usually, good natured, honest questions that people really just want to know the answer. So, to the inquiring minds that need their fix of useless information, I'd like to just set the record straight.

Question 1. You live in Mexico, so why don't you have a tan?
To me this is like asking, you live in Seattle, why aren't you wet? Yes, may come as a shocker, but there is inside in Mexico, too. And, another shocker here, I have a day job. And to just keep the shock effect going, I don't live in Cancun, wish I did, but I don't. So, the answer to this question is the following: My life consists of going to work, coming home, taking care of a baby, cleaning (sometimes), etc. It doesn't leave to much time for basking in the rays. Plus, where would I bask? The parking lot in front of my house just seems like maybe not the best place.

Question 2. When are you moving back to the USA?
This one is a kick in the guts every time I hear it. I love Washington. I love the trees, the fresh air, the Cheez-its, the Targets, the Old Navys, ok, getting off track. Point, I love where I am from. But there comes a time in every young woman's life, (please imagine me with grey hair in a rocking chair while I share) when she needs to make the decision that's best for her family. My family unit consists of Ramon, me and AV right now. Here's the short answer, I don't know. We will be wherever it is best for us to be for as long as it is best for us to be there. That means anywhere in the whole wide world. For now, it means Puebla. If you know how to convince my husband that Washington is the best place for us, by all means, share away.

Question 3. Will AV speak English?
Short answer, She'd better. Long answer, I speak 100% English to her and around her. I blab on and on about anything and everything so that she is inundated with English. The rest of her world operates in Spanish. I can't control that. She'll speak all right, she might prefer Spanish, but she'll be a native English speaker.

Question 4. What's it like where you live?
I get the feeling that people have two very general understandings of Mexico- tiny little towns where everyone wears sombreros and beach paradises where only tourists where sombreros. I don't fall into either of those categories. (I know I'm like totally shattering some people's worlds right now, sorry) Puebla is the 5th largest city in Mexico. Approximately 2 million people. Yeah, so it's big. It was one of the stops along the way for Hernan Cortes as he travelled and claimed Mexico for Spain from the port of Veracruz to what we now call Mexico City. Puebla is known as the city of angels. And, now I sound like a tour guide. Long story, short. It's a huge metropolis.

Those are the main questions that I commonly hear, but if you'd like to hear my witty, intelligent, and oh-so-interesting answers to any other questions, feel free to share.

Like there was ever any doubt

In my world, since March 30th, there has never existed even the slightest shadow of a doubt about who's kid is the cutest in the entire world. Just so we're all clear, it's my kid.

Case in point. I give you the following:

AV has shades.

There are no words to describe how awesome she looks.

Learning a lesson...

AV has two new tricks. Rolling over and screaming.

Not at the same time or that would be three tricks.

I'll focus my mind on the first trick while I write this to remind myself how normal, sweet, smart, and wonderful she is. It's so cute to put her down on her belly and watch her flip right over on to her back. She gets so much momentum sometimes that she almost does a full 360. On Saturday, I told Ramon that by the time we got back from the US, she would be rolling over. Not 5 minutes later, she did!

Now that I've calmed myself down, I'll focus on the second trick. I guess I shouldn't describe this so much as a trick as it is, hmm, what word shall I use? Thinking... Choosing wisely... Umm, what do you call the thing that makes you think twice about having another baby? I guess for lack of a better word and considering my mood, we'll call it "extreme vocalization" for now.

AV has learned how to extreme vocalize. Yes, that sounds much better than scream bloody murder. This has come in tandum with her refusal to take long enough naps to make her not so tired. I feel like I've got one in the "win" column because I am about 89% sure that she cries because she's tired. Another 1% thinks she has something wrong with her. The last 10% is the first-time parent uncertainty bubble that looms around every possible child-centered decision.

Hearing your child scream, I mean extreme vocalize, is a sure-fire way to make you feel like just about the worst parent out there. Part of me wonders when I can expect a knock on the door from curious neighbors wondering just what in the world I am doing to her. She has this really awesome knack (Does knack have a silent-k? I feel like it does, or at least should) for vocalizing when we are around Ramon's family. So, the discussion begins, what's wrong with her? To which the defensive new-mom in me wants to scream, "Nothing! Sometimes babies cry!!" but to which I nicely (at least it's nice in my head) say, "I don't know."

We started a new nap routine today- Operation Nap Time. It worked pretty well in the morning. She slept for an hour and a half and only needed her binky back in once. We tried again this afternoon and she slept for half an hour. Then we went to my in-law's to eat, and the vocalizing commenced. COME ON, AV! I mean, seriously, you couldn't just vocalize at home? You had to save it for the abuelos?!

After rocking and swaddling and shushing her to no avail, I politely said goodbye and wandered home. She was quieter outside. (Putting that one in the ideas pile for ways to get her to vocalize less extremely) I came home put her in the sling to chill her out some and then transfered her to the crib. I could have kept her in the sling, but mom needs a break.

Here's my top 10 new-mom self-help counselor advice-
1. Chill out, mama. Babies cry. That's their job.
2. You need to cry with her? Go for it. But, only for a minute. No wallowing.
3. (Very important epiphany) Put her down and walk away. Step away from the baby, crazy woman.
4. This, too, shall pass.
5. No one said parenting would be easy, they just said it would be worth it.
6. It's beer o'clock somewhere. She's asleep now, reward yourself with whatever you want, beer, chocolate, facebook, whatever floats your boat, honey girl.
7. Tomorrow's another day. Maybe she won't cry. If she doesn't, great. If she does, you'll deal with it then.
8. You think she's crying because she's tired. You're probably right. Go with that. If it doesn't work, try another idea.
9. Take a deep breath. Relax. Get your shoulders out of your ears from being so tense. That's not helping anyone.
10. Jesus, I trust in you. (I said this all through my labor and all day for the first few weeks of her life. It helped then and I'd forgotten because I'd gotten confident.)

When the goings get rough

It's times like these that I wish Puebla and Seattle were neighboring cities.

My baby nephew, Connor James, was born Saturday, July 10th. His original due date was August 19th. The doctors had scheduled my sister for her c-section on July 27th due to a rare condition called Placenta Accreta. She had been on bed rest, in the hospital for over a month, when she had serious bleeding and they decided that baby needed to arrive even earlier than anticipated.

He's in an incubator, he needs oxygen, he's jaundiced, he's a tiny peanut. He's beautiful.

Knowing the love I have for my baby girl and how I used to cry and cry when she would cry and cry even though she was healthy and strong, I can't imagine the hell my sister and brother-in-law are living right now. I'm crying as I write this just thinking about it.

I wish I could be there right this instant to hold hands, give hugs, distract worried faces, try to calm frightened family. The next week will be an eternity while I wait for the day I can finally be with them.

For now, it's a lot of prayer. Asking Jesus to protect His little angel, Connor. To help him grow stronger with each passing hour. To comfort his Mom and Dad and big brother. To calm their fears. To heal my sister from her surgery. To help them come together as the united family that they've always been. To help them be brave. For their hearts to overflow with peace and comfort. For their sleep to be restful and multiplied so they have the energy for each new day. To know how much we love them and would give anything to make everything better.

May this, one of life's most difficult trials, bring praise and glory to God when Connor and Erin are both home and healthy.